Mike Subritzky

JESUS WAS A KIWI

Yo Gunners!
Be not afraid.
We are here on a mission,
and God is on our side.

How do I know this you ask?

Well Gunners,
Quite simply I have read the Good Book
and in it the Bible clearly says
that people only spoke Russian, Polish, French,
German, Spanish and Japanese
and all of those other “ta-ra-ra” languages
after the Tower of Babel…

And that is a true story Gunners,
like I said the Holy Bible tells us so.

And prior to that, Gunners,
there were no language problems
or accents,
or dialects,
because everyone spoke Maori.
That’s right Gunners, you got it!
Jesus was a Kiwi.

Author’s Note: Religious sermon attributed to a divine service conducted by Gunner James “Junior” Ruri, 161 Battery RNZA