Gary Jacobson

I’VE NEVER SEEN A GENERAL IN A FOXHOLE

I’ve Never Seen a General in a Foxhole.
No congressmen neither,
‘Cause it’s dangerous in that hole.
There in that dirty, earthen bowl.
No politicians bluster with pomp to cajole
Sweet talking as they hear incoming thunder roll
Wager life or death with a roll of the dice
Succumb to hatreds on the spearhead of vice.

Sitting in a foxhole
Is just too much out of control
Just is not a gentleman’s role.
So Corporate CEO’s never stay,
No not even a day.
Not even an hour.
For in a foxhole life’s sweet and sour.
Not suited to their fine pampered tradition
War just a terrible imposition.
All in all a horribly ignoble proposition.

Now if these authority figures that be
With power to throw down war’s gauntlet decree
Indiscriminately,
Haphazardly,
purposelessly,
Randomly,
Cluelessly,
Joined frontline troops fighting the melee
In foxhole’s most assuredly
A task most arbitrary
Then “boys next door,”
Would no longer have to go to war.
For surely if it was the leaders life on the line
They would find another way to pass the time.

Yet if generals, corporate CEO’s and politician,
The ones inciting war’s unholy sedition,
Following their own greedy politico ambition
Just bean counters with financial aspiration
Bunked on battle’s perimeter in a foxhole,
Surrounded by Charlie,
Who could believe his luck hardly
Licking his chops their general heads to roll,
It would surely delight my soul.
For then there would be war-no-more!
Oh, then there would be war no more!

If a nation’s leaders had to slug it out
Sit in a foxhole redoubt
With death hovering egregiously about
All problems would be miraculously
Expeditiously,
Diplomatically,
Expediently,
Taken care of swiftly,
Tactfully,
With suddenly caring affinity.

If politicians had to sit in foxholes
With generals ruminating on their souls
Sworn enemies would suddenly find ways to talk
Wouldn’t be so quick from settlement to walk
From talk of peace to balk.
There’d be meaningful deliberation;
Discovery of the lost art of negotiation.

If corporate CEO’s had to sit in foxholes
Politicians cogitating on newly found goals
Generals would abruptly
Arrange with amazing sensitivity
For peace to come instantaneously,
Suddenly
With pseudo brotherly propensity,
Immediately
Brilliantly showing perceptive acuity
Albeit with the usual grand ceremony.

All conflict would be solved
Cankerous international arguments unscrambled
Disputations fairly adjudicated
Cantankerous war legions recalled
Once and for all adversaries absolved
Peace on earth at long last resolved!

Then Oh God
There would be war-no-more!
Thank God.
There would be war no more