Robin Amy Bass

THE LAST ONE

We talk until dawn and we sleep until two.
It’s one of those times when the thing I should do,
Is listen to you and not try to say much;
Measure my candid remarks and my touch.

Nights that precipitate what will occur,
Often start out with a hum or a purr.
Suddenly all of the music is gone.
You still cannot sleep as I stifle a yawn.

Innocent pleasures will soon fade away.
Earlier on it was all about play.
You make some music, while I write a poem.
“Just hanging out” so we don’t feel alone.

I read aloud, though at times you say “hush,”
“Just one more edit” – I watch as you crush
Another cigarette in the baseball ash tray.
I see the circles of smoke as they stray

Into the midnight and towards next day.
“You should be sleeping”, I know you will say
“Aren’t you coming?” I ask with a sigh.
“I just can’t sleep and I can’t tell you why.”

“I had some thoughts, ones that just won’t let go.”
I think, I know where we’re heading – And so…
I will not get into bed all alone.
I feel like Ruth – for she knew that her home

Was by the side of the ones she held dear.
“Wither thou goest… Can’t you see I am here”
So I pretend that a second wind blows
I too will follow. I’ll go where this flows.

We talk of lovers we’ve had in the past.
How can I show you that you are my last?
And you’re the first – in the ways that mean most.
No declarations – I’ve chosen to coast.

You tell me that your last girl was insane.
“She said her credo was “There Must Be Pain”
You seem surprised that I’m smiling at you
“Don’t tell me, this is what you believe too?”

I’m thinking, ‘Maybe it’s me who’s insane?’
I hate that saying “No Pain then No Gain”
“Never believed it, and will not embrace
Any such motto,” I turn to your face,

“She got it wrong – your old lover, my dear”
Now you’re suspicious, “You’re not being clear.”
I brush a tear, “I will tell what’s true.”
And as you stiffen, I come closer to you.

I wrap you up in the tightest of hugs.
I whisper something – as I feel you tug.
I don’t let go – I will not let you shove
“There must be passion and there must be love”

“Least that’s that the way it must be for me”
‘Lest I remind you that I am not she.’
I will just hold you – your hand and your heart…
I know it’s painful when things fall apart.

But I will help you – and you will help me;
Everyday stuff and the dammed PTSD.
When there is pain, I will search out the peace
I’ll bring you comfort and love and release

And on those nights when you can’t do it all
When you hear voices of dead as they call
“T-bone I’m cold,” You will hear my voice too
“Honey you’re home now, I’m right next to you”

I’ll hold on tight and I will not let go
Until the last shiver is gone and I know
Your demons have settled their score for the night
I will hold on, as the dark becomes light

Make a suggestion – “We should get some rest”
I do not mention your unwelcome guest.

You say, “You’re tired. I guess we should sleep.”
7 AM – You will not see me weep.
Not till I’m sure that it’s rainbows you see.
Not till I’m sure that you’re dreaming of me.